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    Home » Lifestyle » Random » Writing

    Why I Don't Let The Haters Get To Me

    January 30, 2012 by Jenn 37 Comments

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    Once upon a time, there was a girl who started a blog.

    She didn't really know what a blog was, or that there were literally millions (or so it seems) of other bloggers out there, doing the same thing she was.

    She wanted to write. She wanted to make people laugh, and smile, and cry.

    She wanted to connect.

    As time passed, she met other bloggers and joined forums and online groups to make friends, learn how to be a better blogger, and network with companies. She learned that she could actually make money by writing about products and services that she was using anyway.

    Her friends and family said, You go, girl!

    She turned her very personal Twitter account into a PR-friendly, social networking tool. Instead of using Twitter to simply talk to other people with similar interests, she had to market herself as a blogger too.

    Goodbye, F word. 

    She began reading a ton of blogs, commenting and sharing.

    Good bye, free time. 

    She learned that she had to build a Facebook Fan Page, Google+ Page, lower her Alexa ranking and increase her Klout score.

    Goodbye, even more free time. 

    She had to learn the basics of HTML and CSS to make her blog pretty, professional and attract readers.

    Ugh.

    She worried about traffic. How to get new readers, how to keep them reading, how to get them to share her posts with their friends.

    She stayed up late at night, reading about SEO. 

    She hosted a few giveaways for cool products that companies asked her to promote.

    She increased her Facebook followers and received very nice thank you emails from her winners.

    She started to learn a thing or two about blogging. A few new bloggers reached out to her, asking for tips on being successful.

    She beamed with pride. 

    She was chosen by a blogger as her writer for a trip to Jamaica, where she went on her first press trip.

    She was ecstatic. 

    She watched her traffic grow, and finally decided to put up ads on her site.

    She made $16 a month. LOL

    She saw other bloggers writing about how they disliked certain things that other bloggers did: running giveaways, writing posts specifically that will do well on sharing sites, using certain themes and blogging platforms that they didn't care for, "cheating" on their stats by requiring a Twitter or Facebook follow as a contest entry option...

    And she thought to herself, who cares? It's just their opinion.

     

    This is my blog. I paid for the domain name. I pay the monthly hosting. I have spent countless hours learning HTML so that I can design my site how I would like it to look without having to spend $$ hiring a designer.

    I have spent hours upon hours, days upon days, learning the basics of SEO. Crafting each post to be visually pleasing and to be somewhat interesting, at least. I network like a champ. I take a zillion photos of everything, all the time, in case I want to use the photo later in a blog post. I sit at my laptop for hours each day, visiting other blogs and showing support and sharing the love.

    This blog? I made it. It's mine.

    Everyone is entitled to their opinion. Instead of worrying about the criticisms of others, I choose to ignore them.

    There will always be people who disagree with you, with the things you do or say, and how you conduct yourself. Sometimes they have a valid point or helpful advice, and sometimes they don't.

    When I read those posts from other bloggers that are helpful, I pay attention. When I come across posts that are mean spirited and full of envy and hate, I ignore.

    There are thousands of blogs out there, just waiting to be read. When you come across a mean-spirited rant against bloggers, just ignore them.

    I am far too busy trying to make my own blog successful to spare any time visiting bloggers who are mean and hateful.

     

    What about you?

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    About Jenn

    Jenn, AKA "The Rebel Chick," is a single woman who strives to help her readers live their best lives possible. Whether it be through sharing new recipes, sharing her dating stories, or encouraging people to embrace adventure and travel, she aims to inspire people to live full, happy and authentic lives.

    Reader Interactions

    Comments

    1. Karen

      January 30, 2012 at 10:49 am

      I agree. Those people who can only tear you down, need to be thinking about how they come across to the world, not about everyone else.

      Reply
      • Jenn

        January 30, 2012 at 10:53 am

        Thank you! It just makes them look petty and mean, and I don't want any part of that!

        Reply
    2. Jennifer

      January 30, 2012 at 11:14 am

      I just do not understand her problem. People really do think they know everything and apparently have connections to other people that in turn tell them everything - and it's all correct (in their eyes). I do my own thing and I seriously do not give a crap what other people do.

      If I see another blogger going on a trip WTH am I going to bitch about it?! That obviously just means I'm doing something wrong and I need to figure out what that is, fix it, improve my blog and then in turn I'll get invited in future trips and opps. Simple.

      But no, some people decide that acting like they are in middle school is a better choice and makes their boring life just that much more filling.

      Grrr. this crap pisses me off.

      Reply
    3. Katie

      January 30, 2012 at 11:25 am

      I'm totally giving you a standing ovation right now!!

      Reply
      • Jenn

        January 30, 2012 at 12:39 pm

        Thank you!! 🙂

        Reply
    4. RJ

      January 30, 2012 at 11:29 am

      Oh I totally understand and I'm so sorry that you have to go through this. I get hate ALL the time from people. Gosh, you should see and read some of the e-mails that I get. It's pretty much full blown cyber-bullying. It's smart to ignore them and I try to do just that.

      Seriously though, if I'm not getting hate for having "immodest" clothing, I'm getting hate because I have ads on my sidebar. People are crazy and they kill me. They really, really do. 🙂

      Reply
      • Jenn

        January 30, 2012 at 12:39 pm

        Luckily, this wasn't an email or anything directed at me, more it was something that was brought to my attention...but the woman who went on a tirade against bloggers doing giveaways and requiring facebook and twitter followings just got me riled up. It is NOT cheating when it's an optional entry, and it's not inflating traffic. Grrr....

        Reply
    5. mum of all trades

      January 30, 2012 at 12:13 pm

      I'm still new to blogging, just under a year now. At the start it was a fun hobby. I got a bit carrieda way towards the end of 2011 trying to post daily and then I thought hold on, this is becoming hard work! I want to keep it fun but can totally see how others want to pursue blogging more seriously. Each blogger has different motivations and we should respect that. Really found myself nodding along and agreeing to everything in this post. Well said!

      Reply
      • Jenn

        January 30, 2012 at 3:15 pm

        Thank you! It's true, we all blog for different reasons and I really don't think that there is a right or wrong way to go about it (unless you are copying and pasting other blogger's posts, which is obviously bad. LOL)

        Reply
    6. Mel

      January 30, 2012 at 12:13 pm

      I agree. I try to stay away from all the drama. You can never please them all, so sometimes you just gotta walk away.

      Reply
    7. Canadian Mom Blogger

      January 30, 2012 at 12:26 pm

      Very well said!

      Reply
    8. Mrs. White

      January 30, 2012 at 12:29 pm

      I love how you described all the work that goes behind working on a blog. It is very difficult to maintain and market a blog.

      Your response to this is classy and admirable!

      Reply
      • Jenn

        January 30, 2012 at 12:32 pm

        Thank you! It's true, I spend a TON of time working on my blog, so to hear that someone is calling bloggers that require Twitter & Facebook following as part of their giveaway entries cheaters is just infuriating!

        Reply
    9. Jen-Eighty MPH Mom

      January 30, 2012 at 12:49 pm

      Awesome post Jenn! I honestly don't know who has the time to go around to see what is "wrong" with other bloggers. We should all just do our thing, and improve where we can.

      Reply
    10. Katie

      January 30, 2012 at 1:30 pm

      You know, it is more than just about "ignoring" the mean spirited ones. I actually used to really read a particular bloggers posts ALL THE TIME. Until she wrote about how most bloggers traffic was "fake" using a particular sharing tool....oddly enough, she uses the same tool. But instead of just "ignoring" that one post - it made me think about who this person really was...and I no longer wish to read this persons blog anymore.

      Good for you for writing this. It needed to be said. WHO CARES? Get over yourselves already.

      Reply
      • Jenn

        January 30, 2012 at 3:14 pm

        I completely get what you mean. The blogger that inspired me to write this post was actually someone I've never heard of before. LOL So she did NOT get a new reader with her angry tirade!

        Reply
    11. Maryann

      January 30, 2012 at 1:33 pm

      I've learned that I can not please everyone so I should at least please myself. Many people don't like what I do or say or think. But guess what, I do and so do a lot of other people. As my father always says "that's why they make chocolate AND vanilla" if we all liked the same things life would be pretty boring, no? Let the haters hate.

      Reply
    12. SoberJulie

      January 30, 2012 at 1:49 pm

      I've learned the hard way not to put too much value on other people's opinions. That's their deal. We spend loads of time in the backend of our blogs, we connect and share by choice. I review and giveaway by choice.

      By choice I've made my blog something I dig.

      I dig yours as well!

      Reply
    13. Nolie

      January 30, 2012 at 2:03 pm

      I approve this post 🙂

      Reply
      • Jenn

        January 30, 2012 at 2:54 pm

        LOL Thank you!

        Reply
    14. Hanan

      January 30, 2012 at 2:20 pm

      So you pretty much just wrote about me. I agree with every single word you wrote.

      Reply
    15. Henrietta

      January 30, 2012 at 2:33 pm

      Hey, that sounds like my blogging journey too (along with those other million bloggers, lol!) I cannot understand why some people have to bring drama everywhere they go. Perhaps it's all just a ploy to get people to their own blogs? I say why worry about what everyone else is doing? If you don't like it, don't read it!

      Reply
    16. TheBargainBabe

      January 30, 2012 at 3:18 pm

      I try to not give a crap what people think of me, my family, my parenting style, my house, etc. I guess blog would fall in there too. 🙂

      Ultimately God's opinion of me matters very much. Anyone else's, does not.

      Reply
    17. Sarah

      January 30, 2012 at 3:30 pm

      Amen Jenn. You have to do what works for you and your blog, there aren't enough hours in the day to waste time on what anyone else thinks about it.

      Reply
    18. Maureen

      January 30, 2012 at 7:35 pm

      AMEN!!!! I'm convinced that the people who go around dictating what other bloggers should and shouldn't do are blog-insecure (and yes, I am using that term from now on!!). They have to make up all these rules so that they can feel better about their own decisions. If people stay true to their own beliefs (like you), there is no need to tear down others.

      Reply
    19. Mom Foodie

      January 30, 2012 at 7:41 pm

      Why do i feel like I should start singing Sinatra

      "I did it my way"

      lol

      Reply
    20. ohkeeka [The Type A Housewife]

      January 30, 2012 at 8:25 pm

      I used to do a ton of reviews & giveaways, interspersed with recipes and personal content. (Now I'm pretty much 100% food on TTAH.) A lot of bloggers got all uppity about the fact that I did the giveaways and even though I don't anymore (well, not much at least), some of them STILL won't give me the time of day. I'm not really sure why some people care so intensely about what other people do.

      Reply
    21. Shop with Me Mama (Kim)

      January 30, 2012 at 10:10 pm

      Excellent post girl. Couldn't have said it better myself!

      Reply
    22. HilLesha

      January 31, 2012 at 9:10 am

      I feel the same way you do, and honestly, I don't understand why people are like this. It all boils down to it being cyberbullying. Life has enough drama as is. Therefore, I try my best to avoid adding anymore to it.

      Reply
    23. Rafael Fernandez

      January 31, 2012 at 10:44 am

      great post!!!! there is enough drama in the real world to let some haters on the web get the best of you

      Reply
    24. Catherine Davis

      January 31, 2012 at 11:00 am

      Yes, yes, yes! Some people aren't happy unless they're making others as unhappy as they clearly are. Don't get sucked into their world, rock your own!

      Reply
    25. Mellisa

      January 31, 2012 at 11:36 am

      Miserable people want others to feel just like them! When I started blogging I was amazed at the outpouring of support from other bloggers and readers just like myself. And then sadly one day I realized that there are those few people that complain and gripe about things that have nothing to do with themselves. I for one can't stand this type of people! If you don't like someone's blog or what they are doing..don't read it!

      I'm so glad you wrote this post!

      Reply
    26. Jodi

      January 31, 2012 at 12:19 pm

      Even though I've blogging in some form or another for over 10yrs, I feel like a newbie b/c the past few months I've started to really want to "monetize" my blog. With a child going to college this fall, I need to make as much extra $$ as possible.

      thankfully, I've yet to encounter any one being ugly or rude. I'm sure it will happen, but for the most part, everyone I've ran across has been super helpful and willing to give tips.

      I love that b/c in my profession, where I spend 40hrs of my week, it's like wading around with sharks, you can't trust anyone b/c everyone is only out for themselves. thankfully, my blogging community is not like that at all.

      Reply
    27. Dealectable Mom

      January 31, 2012 at 12:57 pm

      I'm with you sister! I DO NOT understand why others judge others. I think it's childish and it puts a bad taste in others mouths about bloggers. You just keep rocking' your shit and ignore the nonsense!

      Reply
    28. Sheri

      January 31, 2012 at 2:15 pm

      This is so well written. I agree that there are helpful posts (how to articles, etc), then there are those that I don't have the time for and as soon as I see one blogger try to cut down all of the rest, I ignore them and never return to see if they actually have anything intelligent to read, because I know they don't.

      Reply
    29. Andi

      February 01, 2012 at 3:27 am

      BRAVO!!!

      Reply
    30. Mandy

      February 04, 2012 at 3:28 pm

      I'm so glad not all blogs are alike. My feed reader would sure be boring if they were.

      Reply

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