What? I couldn't hear you over the sound of impending doom. Hi, Hurricane Irene.

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If you live in South Florida, or any part of Hurricane Alley, then you know what to expect between June 1 and November 1.

Ruined weekends. Wind. Rain. Flooding. Tropical Depressions. Tropical Storms. Hurricanes.

This morning I received a phone call from my husband and I knew it wouldn’t be good when he began with, “Did you get my email?”

Oh crap.

See, I don’t watch the news. EVER. About five years ago, I got so fed up with all of the rape, murder, theft and child abuse on our local news that I stopped watching. Completely. I don’t even know what time the news is on or what channels it is on…because I’ve avoided it for so long.

I used to get all of my news from my friends at work.

Now I get all of my news from Twitter. Seriously, I knew Osama Bin Laden was dead before anyone else in my friends or family circle because it was tweeted around midnight and everyone else was already asleep. ha ha ha

So this morning, my husband called to tell me that they were predicting that Irene was headed our way and was predicted to be a category three hurricane when it sweeps past Miami. It WAS predicted to actually hit Miami…guess what else was predicted to pass Miami by but at the last minute, hit us full force and changed our lives forever? Hurricane Andrew. You can read about my Andrew experience here.

Fan-f*cking-tastic.

I headed out to round up our supplies after taking a look at the radar…

found this at noaa.gov

As you can see, the probability of tropical storm force winds are at 60/50% for my area…and that’s if Irene doesn’t shift West.

I’ve stocked up on the basic Hurricane Supplies. Every South Florida homeowner knows this list by heart…

bottled water – and plenty of it
toilet paper & paper towels
ICE ICE BABY – when the power goes, you can keep food cold in your freezer if it’s full of ice for at least 3 days
non-perishable snacks (pb&j crackers, chips, Little Debbies)
non-perishable foods like peanut butter, jelly, bread, etc
flashlights, batteries and emergency candles, matches and lighters
paper plates, cups and plastic utensils
garbage bags – for cleaning up your yard/house after the storm

We are lucky enough to have a propane grill that has a burner as well as the grill part…so I have a small stockpile of pasta and pasta sauce, which we can easily cook if the power is out and we get tired of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.

Everything I bought will be used even if we don’t have a party. Some people go nuts and buy a ton of things that they end up tossing after the hurricane scare is over, but I’ve learned over the years to only buy things that I would use anyway, or can easily be returned afterwards if the hurricane does pass us by. For instance, I bought three high-powered flashlights – I wouldn’t normally need these, but I asked the manager at my grocery store if I can return them if I don’t open up the packaging and he said definitely.

I also filled my car up with gas and plan to wash and dry every piece of clothing and towel we own before the storm hits Thursday.

I’m ready. I have a 5 year old roof (thanks to Wilma tearing all the shingles off my old one) and we had storm-impact (RE: Hurricane-proof) windows and french doors installed less than two years ago. I feel pretty optimistic about this storm. My above-ground pool and patio furniture may not survive, but hey, that’s what insurance is for, right?

How do you prepare for a hurricane? Do you have a strategy?