Planning our wedding 10 years later

I didn't go to homecoming. I didn't go to prom. They seemed silly.

I got married in the courthouse, with a small ceremony with my father's side of the family in North Carolina at my cousin's church. I have about 15 photos from my wedding day.

Next year will mark the 10th anniversary of my marriage. During our 9th anniversary dinner a few weeks ago, Chris and I discussed a renewal of our vows for our 10th anniversary.

I wasn't sentimental when I was younger. I didn't like the idea of a fancy wedding dress, an elaborate ordeal...I just wanted something simple, something sweet, something easy. The wedding itself meant nothing to me - I just wanted to marry him, to have him all to myself. The actual ACT itself didn't mean much.

Over the years, things have changed. I have watched people come and go in my life, andrealized that some things are worth celebrating on a grand scale. Looking back all these years later, I began to feel that my wedding should have been one of those things.

The funny part is that I didn't even want the church ceremony back then. My parents talked me into it. They wanted something to remember, something to celebrate. My dad wanted to walk me down the isle and my mom wanted to see her oldest daughter in a wedding dress. If I wanted to be a bridezilla, they probably would have gone along with it.

Where do I begin? Do I book a banquet hall or do I have a backyard wedding? Do I have it in my hometown, in Miami, or plan it in the mountains of North Carolina, where the original wedding was? Do I go all out, in an elaborate wedding gown, or pick a simple dress? There are so many options. We have a year to plan...yet, that doesn't seem long enough.

I have already began scouring the internet for gowns...is that silly? Perhaps, but I want to get it right this time. I want the day to be memorable. I want a photographer, not just a few snapshots my cousin took with his camera. I want all sides of the family watching me walk down the isle, not just my grandparents, cousins and an old family friend. I want Chris's family there. I want my friends there. I want the man who introduced us there, the people who have known us the past 10 years. The people who have watched us grow into who we are today.

I spoke with a friend who is planning her own wedding a few days ago and she asked me a barrage of questions...it made me realize that I was entirely unprepared for what I have announced I was going to do. So much goes into planning a wedding - even a renewal of vows.

It is going to be worth it.