I suck.
Yesterday was day 3 of our Lifetime’s 7 Days of Sex Challenge…and while the prompt was “She’s on Top: What do you think your partner wants? It’s your turn to make sparks fly today”…sparks were flying all day long, but they were sparks of exhaustion.
This weekend has been one of the busiest weekends I have ever had. Friday and Saturday were just nonstop. Saturday began at 8:30, when I got up after only four hours of sleep to get ready for my goddaughter’s confirmation ceremony. After the ceremony, we went to have lunch with her family, then I came home and washed and removed fleas from our two new foster kittens. I took an hour-long nap, then got up and got ready for our annual Brew at The Zoo event with out friends. We had an awesome time and I will blog about that later in the week.
The problem with yesterday was that we were both really tired…and then we spent 5 hours drinking beer and listening to really, really loud music…and it was not conducive to romance. You would think it would be, but no. We both had headaches bordering on migraines by the time we got home. And our friends that drove us there, they came in to see the kittens and it was almost midnight by the time they went home and we went to bed.
We failed.
As much as it sucks that we didn’t uphold the challenge last night, I realized something very important.
Sometimes, no matter how badly you want to do something, it just isn’t going to happen and you have to be okay with that. What would have happened if I had pressured my husband, knowing that he had a horrible headache and could barely keep his eyes open?
We would have had a horrible argument. And it’s just not worth it.
I think that there is a very fine line between not being in the mood, or being tired, or unmotivated, and there actually being a legitimate reason not to have sex. While I think it’s really important to sometimes bite the bullet and be intimate just for the sake of being intimate – like what we experienced on day 1 of the challenge – I also think it’s important to not be selfish and pay attention to your partner. Sometimes they just can’t do it. When my husband was complaining about his headache before we even left the festival, I knew not to push the issue when we got home.
We had a lovely time together, dancing to fun 80’s songs, tasting new beers, eating gourmet food, laughing with our friends, holding hands and kissing…it was a fantastic date and you know what?
It was enough.
So we may have failed our challenge on day 3, but we still won. Because we love each other enough to pay attention to those subtle clues and to know when is the right time to insist, and when it’s the wrong time. Last night was the wrong time…but maybe we’ll make up for that today!
I’m having fun with the Lifetime 7 Days of Sex Challenge. I hope that I am inspiring you all to do it for yourselves! It’s fun, and even when we fail, like we did last night, we are still talking and learning and growing closer.
And that is what the challenge is all about, isn’t it?
Lifetime’s 7 Days of Sex airs on Thursdays at 10 pm est on the Lifetime channel. Check it out, you might learn a thing or two!
* I received a survival kit to use during our challenge but all opinions are my own!
I don’t think that’s a fail at all, it sounds like you guys had a great time and it’s important to listen to your partner. If it’s the wrong time for sex, then it is and that’s ok.
It seems like day 3 is a problem for most couples. On the show I noticed that was the day a lot of them had issues too. Sounds like you did what was best for yourselves and the relationship, so I say it is still a win.
Just because you didn’t have sex every day, doesn’t make it a failure, even on day 3! Great job and I will have to check out what the challenge is really about!
No failing!! You are doing great!! There is more to marriage than sex!
I give you props for even trying at the challenge.
You aren’t failing at all. I don’t think sex for 7 days straight makes a relationship at all. You guys are doing great.
When you opened with ‘I suck’ I totally thought this post was going another way.
Glad you still had a great day.
So awesome you re doing the challenge. We all have those days for sure!
At least you two had a good day together though. That is just as important! Sometimes too, you have to take a break!
I’m with Rachel, the first line cracked me up.
That would be such a hard challenge for me!
Intimacy doesn’t just have to be physical — I’d say that a great date with conversation, dancing, etc., can do just as much as the physical can … I think you’re doing great with this challenge!
I just love the pic of you two. Just adorable
This sounds like a cool challenge! And good job for realizing what would actually be best for both of you that day. 😉
Sounds like you had a great day in spite of not being able to complete the challenge. In so many ways, the day was already a success.
Sounds like the day was not lost but a great time was had!!!