Yesterday was day 3 of our Lifetime's 7 Days of Sex Challenge...and while the prompt was "She's on Top: What do you think your partner wants? It's your turn to make sparks fly today"...sparks were flying all day long, but they were sparks of exhaustion.
This weekend has been one of the busiest weekends I have ever had. Friday and Saturday were just nonstop. Saturday began at 8:30, when I got up after only four hours of sleep to get ready for my goddaughter's confirmation ceremony. After the ceremony, we went to have lunch with her family, then I came home and washed and removed fleas from our two new foster kittens. I took an hour-long nap, then got up and got ready for our annual Brew at The Zoo event with out friends. We had an awesome time and I will blog about that later in the week.
The problem with yesterday was that we were both really tired...and then we spent 5 hours drinking beer and listening to really, really loud music...and it was not conducive to romance. You would think it would be, but no. We both had headaches bordering on migraines by the time we got home. And our friends that drove us there, they came in to see the kittens and it was almost midnight by the time they went home and we went to bed.
As much as it sucks that we didn't uphold the challenge last night, I realized something very important.
Sometimes, no matter how badly you want to do something, it just isn't going to happen and you have to be okay with that. What would have happened if I had pressured my husband, knowing that he had a horrible headache and could barely keep his eyes open?
We would have had a horrible argument. And it's just not worth it.
I think that there is a very fine line between not being in the mood, or being tired, or unmotivated, and there actually being a legitimate reason not to have sex. While I think it's really important to sometimes bite the bullet and be intimate just for the sake of being intimate - like what we experienced on day 1 of the challenge - I also think it's important to not be selfish and pay attention to your partner. Sometimes they just can't do it. When my husband was complaining about his headache before we even left the festival, I knew not to push the issue when we got home.
We had a lovely time together, dancing to fun 80's songs, tasting new beers, eating gourmet food, laughing with our friends, holding hands and kissing...it was a fantastic date and you know what?
It was enough.
So we may have failed our challenge on day 3, but we still won. Because we love each other enough to pay attention to those subtle clues and to know when is the right time to insist, and when it's the wrong time. Last night was the wrong time...but maybe we'll make up for that today!
I'm having fun with the Lifetime 7 Days of Sex Challenge. I hope that I am inspiring you all to do it for yourselves! It's fun, and even when we fail, like we did last night, we are still talking and learning and growing closer.
And that is what the challenge is all about, isn't it?
Lifetime's 7 Days of Sex airs on Thursdays at 10 pm est on the Lifetime channel. Check it out, you might learn a thing or two!
* I received a survival kit to use during our challenge but all opinions are my own!