Everyone is getting pregnant! WTF is in the water?!
It’s giving me the tiniest bit of baby fever.
Regardless of the reasons that I would love to have another little one – it’s entirely impossible (thanks to a baby-making-preventative surgery) with my husband. Even though my entire family KNOWS that we can not have more children, they always ask us, “Why don’t you have a baby?”
So…I am seeing a ton of posts lately about pregnancy, babies, how great it is being pregnant, etc. In order to keep that baby fever from making me too jealous, I’ve decided to concentrate on the reasons why it’s awesome NOT to be pregnant right now.
10 Reasons Why It’s Awesome to NOT be Pregnant:
- My husband had a vasectomy four years ago. If I were pregnant, I would also be getting divorced because there is NO way my husband would believe that the baby was his!
- I enjoy sleeping and not being covered in vomit.
- I’m going on a girl’s weekend cruise in November – what fun is lounging by the pool all day if I’m not drinking Pina Coladas?!
- The “beach ball” look does not flatter me.
- Co-Sleeping would be impossible with my two shelties always in the bed. They chase the cat away, it frightens me to think of what they would do to an infant!
- My pregnant stomach attracts small animals.
- My husband travels for work practically half of the month…there would be no one here to drive to the store to buy me pickles and ice cream.
- Child car seats have changed A LOT since 1997. I don’t know how to work the new ones. They intimidate me.
- Nursery? Who has time to remodel a spare room into a nursery? I haven’t even found the time to make it a functional spare bedroom yet!
- If I were pregnant, my daughter would put two and two together and realize that her father and I have sex. I’d like to prevent this from happening for as long as possible. Like…never.
See? I feel a little better now. That is, until I start seeing photos of adorable newborns all over Facebook.